Is anyone else out there annoyed by the prevailing sentiment that trophies for participation are actually a good thing for our kids?
The first time my oldest child received one, I thought it was cute. She was 4 and overjoyed when her coach handed her a nice sized trophy at the end of the YMCA soccer season.
She hardly set a cleat on the field. During the entire season.
In fact, the few times her shoe actually touched the playing field (when her coach carefully carried and placed her onto the field), it was during her immediate (and tearful) sprint back to the sidelines that her cleats did any real work.
The more I thought about it, I was torn. As a parent, I was delighted to see her so happy to receive the trophy. On the other hand, she did nothing to actually earn that trophy. Heck, they didn’t even keep score in the games. I am not picking on the YMCA here either, my kids have gotten “participation trophies” for everything from Pop Warner football to lacrosse and swimming.
Where in life do we get rewarded solely for showing up? What lesson does this teach our kids? How does this prepare them to be productive adults who can compete in a cut-throat world economy?
Moreover, I have four kids. 4 (kids) X 2 (soccer seasons per year) X 8 (years of soccer per kid) = A LOT OF JUNK (and that’s just using soccer as an example…)
And, as any parent will attest, kids do not part with their precious junk easily.
In today’s economic climate, finding and keeping a job is extremely competitive. Just “showing up” might get you a paycheck…but not for long. There are too many other people in line behind you that are hungrier, needier, and will work harder than you if you bring anything less than your A-game. Every day. Even when you don’t really feel like it.
So my interest was piqued when I received an email last week from Anthony Williams, owner of The Tumble Gym at the Factory in Wake Forest, inviting parents and boys ages 6-11, to an information meeting about his new Boys Athletic Training (B.A.T.) program. This ten week program is designed to engage and challenge boys both physically and emotionally. Physically, they will be asked to do different drills and exercises, that may be new and difficult for them. The boys, not the parents, will be responsible for bringing the proper equipment to class. If a boy forgets, he will not be able to participate in the group training that day, but will run instead. He will still be expected to perform the drills that were introduced during that class. During the program, they will discuss accountability, responsibility, good nutrition, encountering temptation as well as the urge to quit…and pushing past those last two obstacles to find success in ways that they haven’t before.
At the first class, they will be given yellow “B.A.T.” training T-shirts. After the tenth week, the boys will be asked to come in at 7 a.m. on Saturday (early!), and demonstrate (successfully!) what they have learned in the last ten classes. After that, they must complete a 1.2-mile run, and pull a tire up a hill. At the conclusion, ONLY those who have successfully completely the program, and this test, will receive a black “B.A.T.” shirt.
Inducted into the Brotherhood of B.A.T. Boys, if you will.
I am guessing that those T-shirts will have a lot more meaning to the boys who earn them than any trophy for participation they have been given. That is something of which they can, and should be proud.
If you think your boy could benefit from something like this, I would recommend stopping by the Tumble Gym to find out more details. We went ahead and signed our 9-year-old up. He is both eager and nervous. We’ll see what happens in ten weeks.
I’ll keep you posted.
Becky Elms is a tireless mom of four. Be kind and leave her a comment below. Want to reach her? Use our Contact page.
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Thanks for sharing. This sounds like a great program. I need to find a program like this for my daughter. Interested to hear how it turns out.
Tracy
January 25, 2012 at 3:40 pm